The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson (CBS) - 2006-11-20

Channel: malgent

Transcript

Language: English (original, YouTube automatic captions)

[0:00] Ladies and gentlemen, Craig Ferguson.

[0:13] Hi everybody, welcome. Welcome to Los

[0:15] Angeles, California. Welcome to the Late

[0:17] Late Show. I'm your host TV's Craig

[0:18] Ferguson. PLEASE SIT DOWN, RELAX.

[0:21] UNBUTTON YOUR CARDIGAN.

[0:24] DO LIKE THIS.

[0:28] DO LIKE THAT. YOU TWO, LADIES.

[0:34] OH,

[0:36] it's a great day for America, everybody.

[0:38] It's Monday.

[0:39] One of my many favorite days OF THE

[0:41] WEEK.

[0:47] IT'S LIKE MY SEVENTH FAVORITE DAY OF the

[0:49] week.

[0:50] It's in my top 10 anyway, the Monday.

[0:52] Oh, wow.

[0:56] No, I tell you why it's a great day for

[0:57] America. I tell you why it's a great

[0:58] day. Fox, the Fox network canceled that

[1:01] O.J. Simpson special. THEY CANCELED IT.

[1:03] GOOD.

[1:08] SEE? SEE? WE GOT

[1:10] THE SPECIAL WAS called if I did it,

[1:12] here's how it happened. That's what it

[1:13] was called. That's what it was called.

[1:15] That's what they were They were going to

[1:16] air and you know they'll still air it.

[1:17] They'll just give it a different name.

[1:18] They'll call it if we did air it, the

[1:20] O.J. special, this is what it would look

[1:22] like if we aired it.

[1:26] You know that um

[1:30] You know why Fox pulled the special,

[1:32] don't you? I know why they took it off

[1:33] the air.

[1:34] This show. It was cuz of us. Oh, I know

[1:36] you're thinking what? Yeah, YOU KNOW

[1:39] NO?

[1:40] WAIT.

[1:42] NO NEED TO PATRONIZE ME. I HAVE

[1:44] EVIDENCE.

[1:46] NO, LAST WEEK WE PUT PRESSURE on Fox

[1:49] about this and then then bam, they

[1:50] pulled it and it's been working. We we

[1:52] we went after Mel Gibson, he went into

[1:54] rehab.

[1:56] We went after K-Fed, Britney kicked the

[1:58] bum out.

[2:00] We, we went after Tom Cruise, he married

[2:03] his baby mama. WE DID

[2:05] WE DID THEM ALL.

[2:09] WELL, HIS FAKE BABY MAMA. BUT, WHATEVER

[2:12] IT WAS, YOU KNOW, we

[2:14] No, you you may have heard, you may have

[2:16] heard that Tom Kat, you know, that Tom

[2:17] and Katie, that's my name for them, you

[2:18] know, Tom Kat.

[2:22] They got married this past weekend. We

[2:23] have a photograph from the wedding. Look

[2:24] at that. There they are, all lovely

[2:25] couple.

[2:32] THE HELL ARE YOU LAUGHING AT?

[2:35] LOOK AT THE BRIDE AND GROOM, THEY'RE

[2:36] ADORABLE.

[2:42] YOU KNOW, I LOVE HIS HIS OWN CARS AND

[2:44] his own little plane and everything. He

[2:45] goes around and

[2:54] Apparently, during the during the

[2:56] wedding, they made the guests

[2:57] uncomfortable because they kissed for 3

[2:59] minutes. Three I know, 3 minutes, I

[3:01] can't do anything with a woman for 3

[3:03] minutes.

[3:09] Not enough time for me.

[3:13] Four, 4 minutes is plenty for me.

[3:16] Four and a half if it's the weekend.

[3:17] But, the uh

[3:19] the guests, you know, they kissed for 3

[3:20] minutes and they during the say 3

[3:22] minutes and the guests were like, "OKAY,

[3:23] OKAY, ENOUGH, TOM. WE get it, you can

[3:25] kiss a girl, YOU'RE A GREAT ACTOR.

[3:27] ENOUGH."

[3:33] WHAT?

[3:37] I, YOU KNOW, I WAS SURPRISED FOR a

[3:39] health. I I I thought Tom would want to

[3:41] get the kiss over with and get right on

[3:42] with the dancing, BUT NO.

[3:47] NOW, THEY'RE OFF THEY'RE ON THEIR

[3:48] HONEYMOON, THEY'RE OFF TO THE MALDIVES.

[3:50] Uh they're going to the Maldives where I

[3:53] they have the scuba diving there. It's

[3:54] very, very famous, very good for the

[3:56] scuba diving. I love

[3:57] I love the scuba diving. I wonder if Tom

[3:59] will go diving on his uh

[4:03] I don't know I don't know how

[4:04] experienced he is. It's not something

[4:06] you want to just kind of like go out

[4:07] without training.

[4:10] I I don't know if he's certified. I I

[4:14] HEY, DID YOU WATCH THIS? THE UH THE UM

[4:18] Michael Richards was just on the

[4:19] Letterman show. You know, the the uh the

[4:22] actor who played uh Kramer on Seinfeld.

[4:24] He's in big trouble. He's in big

[4:27] trouble. Over the weekend, he was doing

[4:28] a stand-up gig. He lost it. He used

[4:30] racial slurs at hecklers. There's a

[4:32] video of it. It's awful. It's just I

[4:34] mean, I've seen it. It's awful. There's

[4:35] only one person in Hollywood who's happy

[4:37] about this, Mel Gibson. Everybody else

[4:39] is like, "Oh no."

[4:41] Mel's like, "Yes."

[4:45] Oh man,

[4:47] thank you.

[4:48] But,

[4:49] there there there may have been signs

[4:50] that Michael Richards was a racist

[4:52] anyway. I mean, he spelled Kramer with

[4:53] three Ks. So, right there.

[4:58] And when he used to burst into the

[5:00] apartment in Seinfeld, you know, he was

[5:01] kind of like, "Boom, Jerry." And he'd

[5:02] come in the door like that, it's cuz he

[5:03] was goose-stepping up the stairs. THAT'S

[5:05] WHY.

[5:13] AND THE SEINFELD CO-STARS ARE SPEAKING

[5:15] OUT. Not all of them are supportive. You

[5:16] know, when somebody, you know, called

[5:18] the Soup Nazi thinks you've gone too

[5:20] far. You've gone too far. You know what

[5:22] I mean?

[5:23] He'll have to do something dramatic to

[5:24] save his reputation. He should

[5:26] He SHOULD SUE HIMSELF.

[5:30] KRAMER VERSUS KRAMER. THERE YOU ARE.

[5:33] YEAH, YOU'RE RIGHT. ALL RIGHT. WE CAN go

[5:35] now.

[5:36] Hey, the uh what happened at the

[5:38] weekend? The box office at the weekend.

[5:40] The Yeah, that's that's right. A big

[5:42] upset for me. The James Bond movie was

[5:44] beat by THE PENGUIN MOVIE.

[5:49] WHAT THE HELL IS THAT? THE PENGUINS BEAT

[5:51] JAMES BOND?

[5:53] BRITAIN'S BEST SECRET AGENT DEFEATED BY

[5:56] A PENGUIN?

[5:59] POULTRY BEAT BOND?

[6:04] THIS WOULD NEVER HAPPENED WITH SEAN

[6:05] CONNERY WAS BOND. IT WOULD NEVER HAVE

[6:07] HAPPENED.

[6:09] YOU SKINNY LITTLE BALD scunt take my

[6:11] ass. Your breath SMELLS LIKE FISH.

[6:21] WAIT A MINUTE. WAIT A MINUTE.

[6:26] WAIT A MINUTE, SHOLAY is mine.

[6:29] Must have been the sushi.

[6:32] I didn't see uh I didn't see the Happy

[6:33] Feet, but I did get to play with

[6:35] penguins this weekend. Yes. What you're

[6:37] saying?

[6:40] Silently inside yourself you're saying,

[6:42] "What?" Like this?

[6:45] NO, I SAID SILENTLY INSIDE THEN YOU SAID

[6:48] IT.

[6:49] WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?

[6:52] PENGUINS BEAT BOND?

[6:55] NO, I saw I saw some real penguins this

[6:56] weekend cuz I went to Wayne Newton's

[6:58] house. I was in Las Vegas and I went to

[6:59] Wayne Newton's house. He's the head of

[7:00] the USO and I'm I'm going to the you

[7:03] know overseas to entertain the troops uh

[7:05] over Thanksgiving. So I had to go and

[7:06] see Wayne and you know get my papers

[7:08] stamped and everything.

[7:11] So I go to

[7:12] I go to see uh I go to see Wayne Newton.

[7:14] He's got lots of animals. He he and I

[7:16] touched one OF HIS PENGUINS.

[7:19] IT DOESN'T MEAN ANYTHING. IT'S NOT

[7:21] DOUBLE ENTENDRE.

[7:23] I just I TOUCHED A PENGUIN. IT'S NOT

[7:25] LIKE, "OOH, YOU TOUCHED A PENGUIN." YES,

[7:27] A PENGUIN. A PENGUIN WALKED BY AND I

[7:29] TOUCHED IT. THAT'S ALL THAT HAPPENED.

[7:32] BUT YOU KNOW WHEN YOU WHEN I touched the

[7:34] penguin it WENT LIKE THIS.

[7:39] I WAS LIKE, "WHOA!" AND WAYNE SAID, "NO,

[7:40] NO, THAT MEANS HE LIKES YOU." I'm like,

[7:42] "Really?"

[7:46] And the penguins

[7:48] The penguins have got their own little

[7:49] place to hang out. They don't just

[7:50] waddle into the house, you know, they're

[7:52] They're outdoor penguins. Uh, if they

[7:55] want to come inside, they have to go

[7:56] through the little penguin door and they

[7:58] He's got He's got wallabies. He's got

[8:00] which is a kind of like, you know, small

[8:02] kind digital kangaroo. And he's got um

[8:05] He's got an emu.

[8:07] An emu? I know, that's what I said. He's

[8:10] an emu.

[8:11] An emu is it's kind of like an ostrich

[8:13] except peckier. You know, like

[8:16] Cuz like ostriches and emus, they're

[8:18] they're like they're different but the

[8:19] same. They're like crocodiles and

[8:21] alligators. You know, they're different

[8:22] but you don't want to get close enough

[8:23] to find out how and why they're

[8:25] different.

[8:26] I'm trying to explain an emu and an

[8:27] ostrich. Imagine if the ostrich is kind

[8:30] of Alec Baldwin and the emu is Daniel

[8:32] Baldwin, you know WHAT I MEAN?

[8:38] SO, THE EMU'S THE ONE THAT KIND OF GETS

[8:40] DRUNK AND STEALS A CAR AND EVERYTHING.

[8:47] THAT'S CUZ THEY MAKE CHICKEN NOISES AS

[8:49] WELL.

[8:57] ANYWAY, I'm in Vegas uh this weekend and

[8:59] I was doing stand-up shows at the

[9:01] Orleans Casino, which was fantastic fun.

[9:03] I love playing in Vegas cuz I always

[9:04] feel like I'm a big shot when I'm there.

[9:06] Cuz to get from your room to the to the

[9:08] place we are playing, they gave me a

[9:09] security guard to walk across the casino

[9:12] floor, which I would have been fine just

[9:13] walking through, but they gave me a

[9:14] security guard. He was I was kind of

[9:16] embarrassed cuz he was acting like I was

[9:18] Brad Pitt and Angelina or something.

[9:20] Like he's going, like, "Excuse me." He

[9:21] said, "Excuse me." And people are kind

[9:23] of like looking the other way and

[9:24] everyone's going, "What? What?" He's

[9:25] like, "Excuse They're like 10 FT AWAY.

[9:27] EXCUSE ME."

[9:29] "CRAIG FERGUSON IS COMING THROUGH." AND

[9:31] THEY'RE LIKE, "WHO WHO'S THAT?" "YOU

[9:32] KNOW, THE THE LATE NIGHT GUY." I WAS

[9:33] LIKE, "PLEASE, you don't have to do

[9:35] this."

[9:36] "YOU KNOW, THE GUY THAT TOOK OVER FROM

[9:37] KELBORN? WILL YOU SHUT UP?

[9:40] WHAT, THE ENGLISH GUY? THE GUY THAT WAS

[9:41] ON THE DREW CAREY SHOW? YEAH, YEAH.

[9:43] LIKE, CAN WE JUST GO?

[9:48] ANYWAY, I WAS IN VEGAS. I HAD A VERY

[9:50] nice time. I went on I did a late show

[9:52] one night hosted by Bob Saget.

[9:55] Oh, yeah.

[9:57] Now, you probably know Bob for he's the

[9:59] lovable dad from Full House. He's the

[10:01] former host of America's Funniest Home

[10:02] Videos. But, the late night Bob Saget is

[10:05] a very different Bob Saget.

[10:08] He's a dirty, DIRTY, DIRTY WEE BOY.

[10:12] THE SHOW THAT WE THE SHOW was billed as

[10:14] it's going to be uncensored, it's

[10:16] filthy. You know, Bob Saget swore so

[10:18] much, I couldn't really follow what he

[10:19] was saying.

[10:21] I'm like trying to listen for words that

[10:22] are not curse words.

[10:24] I can't even get my I I I think he

[10:25] mentioned his mother once. Other than

[10:27] that, I can't really TELL WHAT'S GOING

[10:37] BOB ASKED ME HE ASKED me to do the show

[10:39] on and but he was kind of worried cuz

[10:41] you know, I maybe I wouldn't BE FILTHY

[10:43] ENOUGH.

[10:47] OH, I'VE GOT A POTTY MOUTH, DON'T you

[10:49] worry.

[10:50] No, it's not a crazy, racist potty

[10:53] mouth. It's just a potty mouth.

[10:58] Anyway, I after the weekend, I drove

[11:00] back from Vegas. I drove back last

[11:01] night. And I passed a a sign for a town

[11:04] I keep I'm amazed with this town.

[11:06] There's a town in Nevada called Pahrump.

[11:09] It's just CALLED PAHRUMP. ISN'T IT

[11:10] GREAT? And I mean, I love America. You

[11:12] can name a town after A FART.

[11:16] WELL, WHAT ARE WE GOING TO CALL THE

[11:18] I DON'T KNOW WHAT WE'RE GOING TO CALL

[11:19] THIS TOWN. WELL, WE GOT TO I DON'T KNOW.

[11:20] THAT'LL DO.

[11:22] ALL RIGHT, WE'VE GOT A BIG SHOW TONIGHT.

[11:24] CHRISTIAN SLATER IS HERE, EVERYBODY.

[11:27] SNOOP DOGG IS HERE. UH-OH,

[11:29] NEVER MIND.

[11:39] >> THE LATE LATE SHOW WITH CRAIG Ferguson

[11:41] sponsored by your participating Chevy

[11:44] dealers.

[11:50] >> It only happens once a year. The Chevy

[11:53] Red Tag Event

[11:55] with the best deals of the season. The

[11:57] price on the tag is the price you'll

[11:59] pay. Now, '07 Chevy vehicles from Aveo

[12:02] to Corvette Z06 come with the GM 100,000

[12:05] mile warranty. Combined with roadside

[12:08] assistance and courtesy transportation,

[12:10] it's the best coverage in America.

[12:12] See some red, save some green.

[12:15] See your local Chevy dealer.

[12:22] >> The Macy's Thanksgiving Sale is this

[12:24] Tuesday and Wednesday.

[12:27] Save an extra 10 to 20% when you use

[12:29] your Macy's card.

[12:50] Taking care of my home is not easy. I

[12:52] barely have time for myself anymore. But

[12:54] now, things have gotten a little better

[12:56] with AirWick aromatherapy scented oils

[12:58] in essential oil fragrances like

[13:00] calming, soothing, and relaxation that

[13:03] help me unwind and feel at ease.

[13:09] If only for a moment. AirWick scented

[13:11] oil aromatherapy fragrances, it's good

[13:14] to be home. And to experience

[13:16] aromatherapy anywhere in your home, try

[13:18] AirWick Decor Sphere.

[13:20] >> Tonight, Dave's all new with Hugh

[13:21] Jackman. And later this week, stupid pet

[13:23] tricks, a top 10 from Dr. Phil. And

[13:26] >> happy Thanksgiving.

[13:28] >> An all new Thanksgiving late show.

[13:30] >> Your fireplace adds so much to your home

[13:33] and Gordon's can add even more. Gordon's

[13:36] Fireplace Shop and Home Decor. Selection

[13:39] second to none. Glass screens, fire

[13:41] accessories, high efficiency natural gas

[13:44] fireplaces, plus home furnishings that

[13:46] will add to the warmth of your home.

[13:49] Portland's finest selection of fireplace

[13:50] screens, gas logs, and gas fireplaces on

[13:53] sale today. Everything for your

[13:56] fireplace. Gordon's Fireplace Shop and

[13:58] Home Decor. Open 7 days a week.

[14:01] >> The one you love doesn't know he could

[14:03] be carrying many viruses.

[14:07] Fact,

[14:08] viruses can live on surfaces for days.

[14:13] Lysol disinfectant spray with the power

[14:15] you trust helps stop the spread of

[14:17] viruses. Use it on common household

[14:19] surfaces to kill dangerous viruses like

[14:21] the flu. Lysol is the number one brand

[14:24] recommended by pediatricians. Lysol,

[14:26] disinfect to protect. Also get trusted

[14:29] Lysol protection with Lysol wipes.

[14:31] >> Home is a feast. It's where you bring

[14:33] people together. Home is Furniture Row

[14:36] where everyone can have a place at the

[14:37] table with our Thanksgiving Savings

[14:39] Event. Enjoy no payments and no interest

[14:41] until 2009 with no down payment required

[14:44] and get prices backed by our 200%

[14:46] guaranteed lowest price pledge. Prepare

[14:48] your home for the holidays at Furniture

[14:50] Row. Don't miss your last chance before

[14:52] Thanksgiving to get no payments and no

[14:53] interest until 2009. Furniture Row, home

[14:56] to four of America's favorite specialty

[14:58] store brands all under one roof.

[15:12] >> WELCOME BACK.

[15:13] WELCOME BACK. WELCOME BACK MY CHEEKY

[15:15] LITTLE PENGUINS.

[15:27] >> I'M LOOKING FOR A PENGUIN NOISE, BUT I

[15:29] DON'T have one. Now, maybe let's see,

[15:30] let's see what I've got. There's some

[15:31] kind OF LIKE A

[15:39] WE'LL GET ONE. WE'LL WE'LL HAVE A

[15:40] PENGUIN NOISE PUT IN. And I'll be too

[15:42] late. It doesn't matter. We've got very

[15:43] very busy show tonight. Do we even have

[15:45] time for an email? Do we have time? All

[15:47] right, one.

[15:48] One.

[15:51] All right.

[15:53] This is uh from Brek in Colorado

[15:55] Springs. Brek.

[15:57] Brek.

[15:59] That's a nice name, isn't it? Brek.

[16:00] Wonder if that's short for something.

[16:01] Breakfast.

[16:02] I am.

[16:07] Brek, isn't that an interesting name?

[16:08] You know, it's kind of like a name you

[16:09] would give a kind of grumpy old grizzly

[16:11] bear or something, isn't it?

[16:13] Wonder if this is from a grizzly bear.

[16:16] Wouldn't that be great if there was a

[16:18] grizzly bear that could use a computer?

[16:20] And be on this show right now.

[16:23] Showing me how to put a penguin noise in

[16:25] there.

[16:27] Anyway, Brek says, or growls in his own

[16:29] native tongue, says uh

[16:31] "I'm a video game nerd." No, it's not a

[16:33] grizzly bear. He says,

[16:34] "I'm a video game nerd. I wanted to know

[16:36] if you were one, too. Do you play any

[16:39] computer or video games? And if so,

[16:40] which one is your favorite?" Well, Brek,

[16:43] I am.

[16:46] I do actually play with the video game

[16:47] very It's called Pong.

[16:53] The ball It's amazing. The ball, you

[16:55] know.

[16:56] Like that, and you have these things on

[16:58] the side. A lot of people think it's too

[16:59] violent, BUT

[17:03] I LIKE IT, YOU KNOW.

[17:06] HEY, do you ever watch that show uh I

[17:09] can't remember what network it's on.

[17:10] It's called Trading Spouses. You ever

[17:11] watch that show? Some people think it's

[17:13] a bit like Wife Swap, but it's not. It's

[17:16] a COMPLETELY DIFFERENT SHOW.

[17:20] IT'S SAY IT'S NOTHING LIKE WAVE

[17:22] SWAPPERS. IT'S EXACTLY THE SAME.

[17:27] I DON'T KNOW WHY I'M SAYING IT LIKE

[17:29] THAT.

[17:31] IT'S exactly the same.

[17:33] Anyway, watch this from Trading Spaces

[17:34] cuz they interview the kids of the

[17:36] different families as well. Watch this.

[17:37] One of the kids in one of the families.

[17:38] Watch this. Sweetheart, she is. A

[17:40] sweetheart.

[17:43] >> I did like the idea of brain surgery

[17:44] first, then I realized that it seemed

[17:46] too boring.

[17:47] >> I'm bored.

[17:49] >> And then like one time there was this

[17:50] girl who was like a plastic surgeon and

[17:51] she was like super fashionable. So, you

[17:53] can sort of combine something that's,

[17:55] you know, like medical with fashion and

[17:57] you know, beauty and stuff.

[18:01] >> She You know, that's the youth. They're

[18:03] coming through. They don't want to be

[18:04] brain surgeons because IT'S NOT

[18:05] FASHIONABLE.

[18:11] NOW LISTEN, OUR PRESIDENT BUSH, OUR

[18:12] beloved president, has been all over

[18:15] Asia for the past eight days. So, we

[18:17] thought it'd be a good time to check in

[18:18] with him.

[18:19] Please welcome PRESIDENT GEORGE W. BUSH,

[18:22] EVERYBODY. GEORGE W. BUSH.

[18:26] THANK YOU, PRESIDENT. THANK YOU,

[18:27] PRESIDENT.

[18:28] NICE TO SEE YOU.

[18:29] HOW WAS HOW WAS YOUR TRIP, MR.

[18:31] PRESIDENT?

[18:32] >> It was great, FERG DETROIT.

[18:35] I'M IN HAWAII FOR FOR A COUPLE HOURS,

[18:37] then it's back TO THE USA.

[18:46] >> HAWAII IS PART OF AMERICA, SIR.

[18:49] >> NO, YOU'RE THINKING OF CANADA.

[18:53] >> AND SO, WHAT COUNTRIES did you visit on

[18:55] your trip?

[18:56] >> Uh

[18:57] Singapore,

[18:59] Asia.

[19:01] Vietnam.

[19:03] >> Vietnam? Vietnam? How did you like

[19:04] Vietnam?

[19:05] >> It's a beautiful country, Craigalicious.

[19:07] I should have come here years ago.

[19:09] >> Is that

[19:10] >> I should have I should have come here

[19:11] years ago, I SAID.

[19:16] >> YEAH.

[19:18] WHAT DO YOU WHAT DO YOU Never mind.

[19:20] What do you What do you say to the

[19:21] critics who compare the war in Iraq to

[19:24] to Vietnam?

[19:25] >> I say no uh

[19:26] I'm rubber and they're glue and anything

[19:28] they say bounces off of me and uh

[19:32] uh sticks to

[19:33] UH THEM.

[19:44] >> WELL PUT, SIR. SO,

[19:46] WERE YOU UPSET that thousands of

[19:48] Indonesians protested your visit?

[19:51] >> Oh, is that what that was?

[19:55] I thought THEY WERE LINING UP FOR THE

[19:56] NEW PLAYSTATION 3.

[19:59] I HAVE ONE ON MY PLANE. Those graphics

[20:02] are dope.

[20:05] >> Do you

[20:06] Do you consider your trip a success?

[20:08] >> I accomplished one thing my daddy never

[20:10] did as president. I went to Asia without

[20:13] barfing on a world leader.

[20:14] >> Good for you. Good for you. Now,

[20:17] you were in Asia You were in Asia for 1

[20:19] week. Are you looking forward to getting

[20:20] back to Washington?

[20:22] >> The hell yeah, the food here sucks.

[20:25] DC might be a cesspool of corruption,

[20:28] but at least you can get A DECENT

[20:29] CHIMICHANGA.

[20:34] >> AND UH

[20:36] AND UH what what are your What are your

[20:38] plans for Thanksgiving, sir?

[20:40] >> I'm having Dick Cheney and Condoleezza

[20:41] Rice over for dinner.

[20:42] >> Uh-huh.

[20:44] >> I can't sit them next to each other,

[20:45] though. Condi doesn't LIKE DICK.

[20:54] >> REALLY? REALLY?

[20:56] >> NO, YOU NEVER know when Dick will go

[20:58] crazy and shoot you in the face.

[20:59] >> Right. I believe THAT'S ALL WE HAVE TIME

[21:00] FOR. WE WILL WE WILL RIGHT BACK WITH

[21:01] CHRISTIAN SLATER, EVERYBODY. Christian

[21:03] Slater when we come back.

[21:41] >> Dive into the season with the warmest

[21:43] Old Navy fashions, starting at $25.

[21:47] >> They play harder.

[21:50] They work longer. They wear the Bengay

[21:53] patch. Deep penetrating Bengay heat for

[21:55] up to 8 hours. What can the patch do for

[21:58] you? Bengay heat, stronger than pain.

[22:01] >> Want the secret to healthy skin? It's

[22:03] just below the surface.

[22:05] Lubriderm skin nourishing lotion with

[22:07] natural sea kelp extract. It helps dry

[22:09] skin absorb and retain moisture, so it's

[22:11] naturally healthy. Lubriderm skin

[22:13] nourishing lotion with sea kelp extract.

[22:17] >> There's an accident in this country

[22:18] every 5 seconds.

[22:22] Allstate thinks that's too often.

[22:26] So, they have rewards to encourage you

[22:28] to drive safely.

[22:30] Now, for each year you go without having

[22:32] one of these,

[22:33] you'll get $100 off your deductible.

[22:35] It's called deductible rewards.

[22:38] It's time to make the world a better

[22:40] place to drive.

[22:41] That's Allstate's stand.

[22:43] Are you in good hands?

[22:48] >> Taking a quick break?

[22:49] >> I'd like to see that for someone very

[22:51] special.

[22:51] >> The Leo diamond, independently certified

[22:53] for superior brilliance and selected to

[22:55] match beautifully by Kay Jewelers.

[22:56] >> Chris, how did you know?

[22:58] >> Every kiss begins with Kay.

[23:02] >> It's ready.

[23:03] >> Introducing Gillette Fusion Hydragel.

[23:06] Fusion's hydrating emollients and

[23:07] lubricants form an invisible layer that

[23:09] protects your skin from the first stroke

[23:12] to the last, adding more comfort to your

[23:14] shave. Gillette Fusion Hydragel.

[23:17] >> You do not have to listen to your right

[23:19] brain. It has no legal rights. The truth

[23:21] is, and I'm speaking to your left brain

[23:23] now, I think it's overrated.

[23:25] >> Can't choose who we're attracted to.

[23:27] It's pheromones.

[23:28] >> Pheromones?

[23:29] >> To resist is futile.

[23:31] >> How often do you try to put yourself in

[23:33] their shoes?

[23:34] >> Oh, because fourth year I took a seminar

[23:35] entitled putting yourself in their

[23:37] shoes.

[23:39] >> Ever had your own head scanned?

[23:40] >> No way. Don't want to know.

[23:43] >> 3 lbs, new episode, CBS Tuesday.

[23:48] >> Buying or selling a home is a big

[23:49] decision for you. Let me help you make

[23:51] it easy and exciting. I have helped over

[23:54] 30,000 families make their home buying

[23:57] dreams come true. Call Genie Shook

[23:59] today.

[24:01] See you at home.

[24:04] Morning.

[24:05] >> Hi.

[24:14] >> That'll be $20.

[24:15] >> I'd like to pay for a couple of his

[24:17] shirts, too.

[24:18] And can you give him my card, please?

[24:25] >> Sure.

[24:30] >> Bold moves. They happen every day.

[24:34] >> Welcome to America's largest Christmas

[24:36] Bazaar. Friday, Saturday, and Sunday at

[24:38] the Expo Center. Thousands of unique

[24:40] gifts from garden art to gourmet foods.

[24:43] You'll find it all at America's largest

[24:46] Christmas Bazaar this weekend.

[24:58] >> WELCOME BACK. WELL, WELL, WELCOME BACK

[25:00] MY FRISKY LITTLE PENGUINS.

[25:12] THAT'S A REAL PENGUIN SOUND.

[25:19] THAT'S NOTHING like the sound of the

[25:21] penguin made when I touched it.

[25:24] Maybe it wasn't a penguin I touched.

[25:26] Maybe it WAS SOMETHING ELSE.

[25:34] MY FIRST GUEST TONIGHT IS A VERY FINE

[25:36] ACTOR. HE'S got a new film, Bobby, which

[25:38] is in theaters now. Take a look at this

[25:39] clip.

[25:40] >> Did you tell them they couldn't leave?

[25:42] >> This is no small thing we're doing

[25:43] tonight. I need every staffer with a

[25:45] pulse on you.

[25:46] >> tell them that they couldn't leave to

[25:47] vote?

[25:48] >> They're not going to vote. Half of them

[25:50] are illegal. They can't vote. Why give

[25:53] them the time off for something they

[25:54] can't do anyway?

[26:01] >> You'll post a memo

[26:02] informing all employees of their right

[26:05] to vote.

[26:07] And because I'm an equal opportunity

[26:09] kind of guy,

[26:11] you've got till the end of the week to

[26:13] clear out your desk and leave. You're

[26:15] fired, Daryl.

[26:17] >> Like crackers. Christian Slater,

[26:18] everybody.

[26:41] ALL RIGHT.

[26:47] WOW. YEAH, THEY'RE

[26:48] >> BEAUTIFUL AUDIENCE I'VE EVER SEEN IN MY

[26:50] LIFE.

[26:50] >> YEAH, YEAH, they

[26:53] They uh

[26:54] They They They A lot of them are

[26:56] beautiful. Some of the Some of them are

[26:57] kind of kind of, you know, pushing it a

[26:58] bit, but they know who they are.

[27:00] No, no, they're

[27:02] >> Gorgeous.

[27:02] >> Yeah, how are you, pal?

[27:03] >> Pretty well. Yeah, very well. How are

[27:05] >> Tell me about the I'm okay, you know, I

[27:06] had this weird thing with a penguin.

[27:08] It's not going through my head.

[27:09] >> Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I know.

[27:11] >> But I'm all right. How Now, tell me

[27:12] about the film, Bobby. I want to get to

[27:14] talk This is about Bobby Kennedy, right?

[27:15] >> Yeah, Bobby Kennedy, sure. It takes

[27:16] place at the Ambassador Hotel. It's

[27:19] all about uh that particular day, what

[27:21] the political atmosphere was like at the

[27:22] time, and uh

[27:24] it was an interesting way to show

[27:26] represent who Bobby Kennedy was, cuz uh

[27:28] Bobby Kennedy obviously was a man of the

[27:29] people, and uh it's a movie about

[27:32] uh 22 different people.

[27:34] >> And what about the the Ambassador Hotel?

[27:36] Did you actually shoot in the Ambassador

[27:37] Hotel? It used to be. It was here until

[27:39] recently, wasn't it?

[27:39] >> Yeah, yeah, they just uh closed it down,

[27:41] and I think they're deciding whether or

[27:43] not they're going to name it the uh uh

[27:45] Robert Kennedy School.

[27:46] >> Really?

[27:47] >> Yeah, that area.

[27:47] >> All right, okay.

[27:48] >> Um but yeah, we did shoot it It's It was

[27:50] the last movie to shoot at the

[27:52] Ambassador Hotel. We were there

[27:53] We were there about 5 6 days, and we'd

[27:55] show up on the set, and there was

[27:57] dump trucks and bulldozers and dirt

[27:59] piles, and we actually

[28:00] >> That's like working at CBS. You used to

[28:02] have

[28:05] Especially Especially when uh Bob

[28:08] Barker's salary arrived, there's a lot

[28:10] of

[28:11] a giant trucks coming in at night, guys,

[28:14] right?

[28:15] More cash for Bob.

[28:19] Yeah.

[28:20] Yeah, it's all right. Do you Do you ever

[28:21] Do you watch the game shows? Do you ever

[28:22] watch Bob Barker on that show?

[28:24] >> Uh I All THE TIME.

[28:25] >> REALLY?

[28:29] NOW, LISTEN, YOU UH YOU UH YOU PLAY a a

[28:31] racist in this movie. Was there a lot of

[28:33] racism problems going around today? Did

[28:35] you see that thing on the internet with

[28:37] uh

[28:37] >> I just heard about it uh based on your

[28:40] uh your speech your your monologue there

[28:42] your speech.

[28:43] >> Yeah, yeah.

[28:44] My fellow Americans or cheeky monkeys.

[28:48] >> Yeah, yeah, no, I I heard that's

[28:50] terrible. It's I I do actually I sure in

[28:52] this in this movie, I mean there's a lot

[28:54] of different characters, like I said, it

[28:55] is about people, and I uh

[28:57] my character represents that part of the

[28:59] population that wouldn't necessarily

[29:00] have agreed with the concepts and views

[29:02] and principles that Bobby Kennedy

[29:03] probably would have stood for.

[29:04] >> Do you ever like when you're an actor

[29:06] working something like that, do you have

[29:07] to find a sympathetic way to portray

[29:09] someone you wouldn't stand in real life?

[29:11] Is Is that Is that difficult?

[29:12] >> Yeah, certainly. I mean Emilio called

[29:15] >> me I was in London.

[29:16] >> Yeah, sorry. Yeah, Emilio Estevez wrote

[29:18] and and directed the movie, and he

[29:19] called me and and uh he told me about

[29:22] the project and some of the wonderful

[29:23] people that were involved, and I I

[29:24] basically I

[29:26] I would have been happy delivering

[29:27] coffee on the set, you know what I mean?

[29:28] It was It was It was the people that

[29:30] were involved there were so great and so

[29:32] amazing that it was uh So, I I actually

[29:34] just signed on. I said, "Where do I show

[29:36] up?" You know? And then I And then I got

[29:37] back to LA and read the script and saw

[29:39] that the character was a little bit of a

[29:41] rough character, but there's a very

[29:42] there's there

[29:43] the characters are all very rich and

[29:45] very realized, and you kind of

[29:46] understand their points of view, and and

[29:48] there was enough of an arc there and and

[29:50] a moment where actually the walls of

[29:52] racism do come down.

[29:53] >> Right. And what were you doing in London

[29:55] when he called you?

[29:56] >> Uh I was at a

[29:58] wonderful One Flew Over the Cuckoo's

[29:59] Nest reunion party.

[30:00] >> Really?

[30:00] >> Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[30:01] >> And you you you you you were doing that

[30:03] that You did the play over there.

[30:04] >> I did the play over there for about uh

[30:06] yeah, I guess a little bit of a year I

[30:08] was I was in in London.

[30:10] >> Did you Did you like London?

[30:11] >> I loved it. No, London is a great town.

[30:13] >> It's It's all right. Yeah, you know, you

[30:14] enjoy having my accent now, you might

[30:16] change your mind, but

[30:20] Did you ever Did you Did you take the

[30:22] play around? Did you tour the country

[30:23] with it?

[30:24] >> No, it was pretty much the West End, but

[30:26] it was a phenomenal experience doing

[30:28] that doing that show. First of all,

[30:29] getting to play Randall Patrick McMurphy

[30:31] was was great, and it was like doing a

[30:33] rock concert every night. I mean, I did

[30:34] a

[30:35] I did a stage dive on the last show.

[30:37] >> Really?

[30:37] >> Yeah, it was pretty fun.

[30:38] >> Nice.

[30:39] >> Sort of counted on that English audience

[30:41] to catch me.

[30:43] >> Did Did they catch you?

[30:49] Did they catch you They caught you then?

[30:50] Cuz I'd be like, "Oh, no."

[30:52] >> Did they catch me?

[30:53] Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

[30:54] >> Is he BETTER THAN YES, GET OUT OF THE

[30:56] >> YEAH. YEAH.

[30:57] WHAT'S HE DOING?

[30:58] >> HE'S CRAZY.

[30:59] >> NO, THAT'S that's

[31:00] >> Yeah, they know they did. They caught me

[31:01] and uh I was I'm here to to tell the

[31:03] tale.

[31:04] >> Well, good for you. Good for you. We We

[31:06] We got to take a break. We're going to

[31:07] come right back. We'll be right back

[31:08] with Christiansen later, everybody.

[31:21] >> Birth control. Back in the day, it was,

[31:23] "Oh, cool. Pregnancy protection. No

[31:25] objection. Birth control will set us

[31:27] free, see?" But now we're tied down by

[31:29] the everyday. Always worrying about

[31:31] forgetting. Upsetting. Raise your voice

[31:34] for a different choice. NuvaRing, birth

[31:36] control evolution, a different solution.

[31:40] A low dose of hormones in a comfortable,

[31:42] flexible vaginal ring. And here's the

[31:44] best thing. NuvaRing once a month is all

[31:46] you need. NuvaRing is not for everyone.

[31:48] It does not protect against HIV and

[31:50] other STDs. Serious risks include blood

[31:52] clots, stroke, or heart attack. NuvaRing

[31:55] is not for women with a history of these

[31:56] conditions or for women with certain

[31:58] cancers or those who may be pregnant.

[32:00] Some studies suggest the progestin in

[32:02] NuvaRing may increase the risk for blood

[32:03] clots. Smoking increases cardiovascular

[32:06] risks, especially in women over 35.

[32:08] NuvaRing users should not smoke. Every

[32:10] week or every day?

[32:12] Not now. No way. Once a month's the

[32:15] thing. I say, "Let freedom ring." Ask

[32:18] your healthcare professional about

[32:20] NuvaRing.

[32:31] >> Chapstick Moisturizer. It's the

[32:33] healthy-looking feel lips long for.

[32:36] >> Hey, Judy. Got a cough and stuffy nose?

[32:40] This Robitussin will relieve them both.

[32:42] >> Hello, Gary with the chest congestion.

[32:45] This Robitussin will help clear it right

[32:47] up. No matter what you've got, there's

[32:49] Robitussin relief with your name on it.

[32:52] >> Tap the can, ladies, for a single you

[32:54] can mingle. There's my double

[32:56] cheeseburger and my sweet sundae.

[32:59] >> I

[33:00] love hot french fries. Top it off with a

[33:03] parfait.

[33:06] >> That'll work.

[33:07] Now's the time to take advantage of the

[33:08] McDonald's dollar menu.

[33:10] >> Food for my party?

[33:11] >> Busted.

[33:13] >> From parfaits to fries to double

[33:15] cheeseburgers.

[33:17] >> Where's my parfait, homie?

[33:21] >> I think I killed someone, Tim.

[33:23] >> A twisted sister.

[33:24] >> You're wondering if she did it?

[33:25] >> No, I'm wondering why McGee never told

[33:27] me he had a sister.

[33:28] >> A tangled web of lies.

[33:30] >> Tell me how you know this guy.

[33:32] >> Threatened to kill him.

[33:33] >> Forgive me for not putting the integrity

[33:35] of NCIS before my sister.

[33:38] >> New NCIS, CBS Tuesday.

[33:41] >> Heather Mills McCartney, the world

[33:43] exclusive interview, next Extra.

[33:46] >> Are you the next Powerball

[33:48] multi-millionaire? Watch the Powerball

[33:50] drawing during Coin News 6 at 11 every

[33:53] Wednesday and Saturday night to find

[33:54] out. Do you have your ticket?

[33:57] >> Home is freedom.

[33:59] Freedom to be yourself.

[34:01] To call the shots.

[34:04] To stake your claim.

[34:07] Freedom. It's here.

[34:10] Furniture Row, where you're liberated

[34:12] from pushy sales people, where there's

[34:14] always a lowest price pledge.

[34:16] Home is freedom, my friend. Home is

[34:19] here. Furniture Row, home to four of

[34:22] America's favorite specialty store

[34:24] brands all under one roof.

[34:27] >> Precision Truss and Lumber, serving

[34:29] Portland Metro's home builders and

[34:31] general contractors since 1971. Our full

[34:34] service lumber division offers complete

[34:36] building packages from the ground up.

[34:38] From framing, hardware, and engineered

[34:40] floor systems to siding, windows, doors,

[34:42] and specialty products. On-time

[34:44] delivery, digital engineering

[34:46] technology, accuracy, quality products,

[34:49] and industry know-how. These priorities

[34:51] make customer care and satisfaction our

[34:53] number one goal at Precision Truss and

[34:56] Lumber.

[35:02] >> Mega Bucks, over 200 millionaires and

[35:05] counting. Will you be next?

[35:07] >> President Bill Clinton and Jay-Z with

[35:10] Ellen in New York.

[35:14] >> Hey, Earl and Randy Hickey.

[35:17] >> Look, I got to warn you, there's a naked

[35:18] old lady in your bushes.

[35:20] >> Oh, yeah, that's Nora. She's a nudist.

[35:22] Kind of weird, if you ask me. Then

[35:24] again, it might be a little weird that I

[35:25] live in a dung cottage.

[35:27] >> What's dung, cuz it smells like cow

[35:28] ploppies?

[35:29] >> Well, it's got cow ploppies in it, along

[35:31] with straw and a little mud for

[35:33] insulation.

[35:34] >> Well, what do you know? Cow crap houses.

[35:37] >> So interesting.

[35:39] >> Not interesting, Earl.

[35:40] >> Crazy. He puts poo on his walls. That's

[35:42] what crazy people do.

[35:48] >> Welcome back, everybody.

[35:51] WELCOME BACK. WE'RE HERE WITH CHRISTIAN

[35:53] SLATER. THAT was from My Name Is Earl.

[35:55] >> I've been having a good time.

[35:56] >> Yeah, I know. That's nice. Ethan and

[35:58] Jason, they're both these guys

[36:00] >> been here and know what they're doing.

[36:00] >> Oh, they're Yeah, really really nice

[36:01] guys. I I had a very very good time

[36:04] playing there.

[36:04] >> Did you put real poop up there? Was that

[36:06] real poop?

[36:06] >> Yeah. Yeah.

[36:07] >> Cuz you're one of them method actors.

[36:08] You like the poop, don't you?

[36:09] >> Yeah, that's right.

[36:11] We took a collection from the crew and

[36:15] >> See, now that you We took it to the edge

[36:16] and then you went too

[36:17] >> far. Well, you know,

[36:19] I was dropped.

[36:20] >> Yeah, I know. You were cuz I was

[36:21] thinking cow poop and then you went to

[36:23] human poop.

[36:25] I know. It's It's not good. It's not

[36:27] good.

[36:27] >> I'm totally ashamed.

[36:28] >> Yeah, that's all right.

[36:30] It's all right. What about We were

[36:31] talking about your kids? What age are

[36:32] your kids now?

[36:33] >> Uh my kids, they're 7 and 5.

[36:36] >> Wow, are they going to go into show

[36:37] business, you think?

[36:37] >> Uh I don't know. I mean, I'd support

[36:39] them either way. My daughter's great.

[36:40] She um you know, I was doing the play in

[36:42] London, and she she it's it's

[36:44] interesting. It's it's uh maybe a

[36:45] genetic thing. She likes to She'll sit

[36:48] and watch the rehearsals all day. You

[36:49] know, it's it's kind of incredible.

[36:51] She'll just sit in the booth and uh not

[36:52] say a word.

[36:53] >> give you notes like that at

[36:55] >> I don't think so. Maybe if she

[36:56] >> Sure. Yeah, I don't know. She's uh she's

[36:58] >> They got dying a little bit.

[36:59] >> my best critic. Yeah, absolutely.

[37:01] Absolutely.

[37:01] >> No, I like that idea. And your father,

[37:03] of course, was an actor as well, wasn't

[37:04] he?

[37:04] >> That's right. Yeah, my father uh you

[37:06] know, I grew up in a sort of a show

[37:08] business uh wild family.

[37:10] >> a casting director. I've been in front

[37:12] of your mom as an actor, FAILING.

[37:14] >> OH, YEAH.

[37:17] IT'S TOUGH. YEAH, SHE'S UH

[37:19] >> NO, SHE WAS VERY NICE about it. She was

[37:20] just like, "No."

[37:23] >> Really?

[37:23] >> Yeah, yeah. No, she was very She was

[37:25] very sweet, very friendly.

[37:26] >> She tends to be rather gentle.

[37:27] >> No, no. She She was all right. There's

[37:28] some very bad casting directors that

[37:30] very mean.

[37:31] >> sure, sure.

[37:31] >> Oh, man.

[37:32] >> No, they're rough. Your mom's a great

[37:33] lady, as well.

[37:34] >> Thanks very much.

[37:35] >> Yeah, absolutely.

[37:35] >> Thanks very much. Uh listen, you know

[37:37] what when you worked one of your first

[37:39] movies, The Name of the Rose, right?

[37:41] With Sean Connery.

[37:42] >> Man, that must have been something.

[37:44] Like, straight out of the bat in a movie

[37:45] with Sean Connery, and you're all like

[37:47] talking like this.

[37:48] >> Yeah.

[37:49] Yeah, yeah, yeah. That was pretty

[37:50] intense. I mean, he is uh James Bond. I

[37:52] mean, the original

[37:53] >> Yeah, he's the only one, you know.

[37:55] >> No penguin could take him down.

[37:56] >> No penguin would ever take him down.

[37:58] >> All right.

[37:59] >> It's not even It's not even close. No,

[38:01] no.

[38:02] Beaten by a bird.

[38:03] >> Oh, man.

[38:04] >> Humiliation.

[38:05] >> Stern penguins.

[38:06] >> You know, in that in that movie you have

[38:08] that sex scene with that beautiful young

[38:11] Italian girl.

[38:12] >> Yeah.

[38:12] >> Oh, man.

[38:14] Do you keep in touch with that girl, and

[38:16] do you have her number, maybe? I don't

[38:19] >> I see her from time to time.

[38:20] >> Yeah, because you That was like your

[38:22] maybe your second time in a movie, is

[38:24] that right?

[38:24] >> Yeah, I mean today it would be illegal.

[38:25] You know.

[38:26] >> Yeah, I understand. Yeah,

[38:27] you couldn't couldn't get

[38:28] >> I mean IT WAS LIKE

[38:29] >> WHAT? YEAH, WHAT IS THAT UP THERE?

[38:31] >> YEAH, YEAH, YEAH. That was incredible.

[38:32] Doing that was uh was amazing, but she

[38:34] was wonderful and I was nurtured through

[38:36] the experience.

[38:41] >> Okay. All right. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[38:43] Do you get uncomfortable with the love

[38:44] scenes? Do you ever think, "Oh boy, I'm

[38:46] starting to enjoy this too much?"

[38:47] >> Yeah, you know what I mean?

[38:50] It depends. Yeah, it depends.

[38:52] >> You just think, you know, the acting

[38:54] stopped and here comes Christian.

[38:55] >> Oh, yeah.

[38:57] Here comes Christian.

[38:59] >> Very good.

[39:00] >> That's right. Well, we've already

[39:01] crossed that

[39:02] >> Yeah, well, I crossed the line.

[39:03] >> I crossed the line tonight.

[39:04] >> I went back over again. But listen, good

[39:07] luck with with the movie, Bobby. It's a

[39:09] It's a really It's a worthwhile cause,

[39:11] and a worthwhile movie. And then and

[39:13] Emilio's coming in, I think, at some

[39:15] point this week to come and talk about

[39:16] it as well. So, thanks for coming in.

[39:17] Christian Slater, everybody.

[39:31] >> from me to you.

[39:40] Let's do this.

[39:44] If there's anything that you want, come

[39:47] on.

[39:48] If there's anything that I can do,

[39:51] let's go.

[39:53] Just call on me.

[39:55] I'll send it along

[39:57] with love

[39:58] from me to you.

[40:02] >> Okay.

[40:04] Next up,

[40:05] Jean Weisman.

[40:19] Boy,

[40:20] I taught her that move. Homegirl can

[40:22] dance, man.

[40:23] >> Learn the moves from Happy Feet. Get

[40:24] dance lessons, songs, and more

[40:26] exclusively on demand with Comcast

[40:27] digital cable. It's Comcastic.

[40:29] >> Catch Happy Feet in theaters November

[40:31] 17th.

[40:33] >> The best in German engineering.

[40:37] A powerful motor.

[40:39] And a handling system for precision and

[40:41] control from Braun.

[40:44] Introducing the world's first electric

[40:46] shaver with the expertise of Gillette

[40:48] blade technology. Precisely angled edges

[40:50] cut hair more effectively with every

[40:52] stroke for Braun's closest, most

[40:54] comfortable shave ever. It even cleans

[40:56] and renews itself. The new 360 complete

[40:58] from Braun. Precision, control,

[41:01] perfection.

[41:02] >> Senator Kennedy, welcome to the

[41:03] Ambassador Hotel.

[41:04] >> America's top critics agree, Bobby is a

[41:06] remarkable movie.

[41:08] >> I watched the news yesterday.

[41:09] >> Gave me hope. One of the best films of

[41:11] the year.

[41:12] >> Those who live with us are our brothers.

[41:14] >> Bobby, written and directed by Emilio

[41:16] Estevez,

[41:32] >> There are over 14 million headaches

[41:34] happening in this country today.

[41:36] But too many go untreated simply because

[41:39] we're away from home. So, we created a

[41:41] fast, new way to get the pure pain

[41:43] relief of Tylenol. Introducing Tylenol

[41:46] Go Tabs. They're portable and chewable

[41:50] for fast headache relief even away from

[41:52] home. It's one small step towards a

[41:55] pain-free world. Stop. Think. Tylenol Go

[41:58] Tabs.

[42:09] >> Happy feet!

[42:15] Awesome. Yeah,

[42:17] nice.

[42:18] >> This thing's got pop.

[42:20] >> Get any new Jeep vehicle like the new

[42:21] Wrangler Unlimited equipped with a

[42:23] Sirius Satellite Radio and you'll get a

[42:24] 12-month subscription to the best radio

[42:27] on radio.

[42:27] >> Now I'm going to try hurricane.

[42:29] >> Show off.

[42:36] >> It's Michael Caine in space.

[42:39] >> Brought to you by Kay Jewelers.

[42:42] >> I went into rehab once for sex

[42:44] addiction. After 3 weeks, they said to

[42:46] me, "Mr. Caine, your case seems to be

[42:49] incurable." To which I replied, "Who the

[42:52] hell said anything about a cure?"

[42:56] >> That was Michael Caine

[42:59] in space.

[43:02] >> If you're watching Craig at home, you're

[43:03] missing half the fun. Consider this your

[43:06] formal invitation to laugh live in our

[43:08] studio audience at a taping of the Late

[43:10] Late Show with Craig Ferguson. Please

[43:12] give us a call at 213-833-6469

[43:16] or visit our website at cbs.com.

[43:24] >> This team's got to start working

[43:25] together.

[43:26] I put you in it, Sweeper, but you need

[43:28] to pick it up. I need someone who's got

[43:30] it all. Speed, agility, power.

[43:36] I'm bringing in the new kid.

[43:37] >> Get the one cleaning tool that does it

[43:39] all. This new Swiffer vac with the

[43:41] Swiffer dry cloth to get the small stuff

[43:43] and a vacuum to suck up the big stuff.

[43:46] Better than a broom and dustpan.

[43:47] >> Way to go, kid.

[43:49] >> Swiffer Swiffer vac. Pick one up for the

[43:51] holidays. Go online for money-saving

[43:53] coupon.

[43:54] >> Code red. Need to hide.

[43:58] >> You again. Hey, where can I compare auto

[44:00] insurance prices at this hour?

[44:02] >> Easy. Get your insurance quote, compare

[44:04] prices from other companies instantly

[44:06] online.

[44:06] >> I save hundreds.

[44:08] >> You'll save time, too. Quote, buy,

[44:10] print. Not much compares with the

[44:12] convenience of Esurance.

[44:14] I've got to fly. If you're on the go,

[44:16] you've got to have Esurance.

[44:17] >> Compare and save on auto insurance.

[44:20] Visit esurance.com or call

[44:22] 1-888-Esurance.

[44:23] >> Taking care of my home is not easy. I

[44:26] barely have time for myself anymore. But

[44:28] now, things have gotten a little better

[44:30] with Air Wick aromatherapy scented oils

[44:32] in essential oil fragrances like

[44:34] calming, soothing, and relaxation that

[44:36] help me unwind and feel at ease.

[44:42] If only for a moment, Air Wick scented

[44:45] oil aromatherapy fragrances. It's good

[44:47] to be home. And to experience

[44:50] aromatherapy anywhere in your home, try

[44:52] Air Wick Decosphere.

[44:57] >> HEY! THE ACE HARDWARE one-day sale is

[44:59] Friday, November 24th. Save on gifts,

[45:02] tools, decorations, and more throughout

[45:04] the store. November 24th only at Ace,

[45:07] the helpful place.

[45:14] >> Even a superhero has to get up in the

[45:16] morning. Duracell, trusted everywhere.

[45:20] >> Superman Returns. Own it on DVD November

[45:23] 28th.

[45:23] >> Well, my credit card miles expired, but

[45:25] don't worry. DADDY'S GOT A PLAN.

[45:27] ORLANDO, HERE WE COME! IS THERE MEAL

[45:30] SERVICE ON THIS FLIGHT?

[45:33] OH, YUMMY! WHO WANTS SOME?

[45:35] >> HANG ON. HOLY MOLY.

[45:40] >> ISN'T THIS FUN?

[45:42] WE SHOULD HAVE SWITCHED TO CAPITAL ONE.

[45:44] >> Get Capital One's No Hassle Rewards with

[45:46] no miles expiration, no earnings caps,

[45:48] AND NO BLACKOUT DATES.

[45:51] >> OH, THAT'S DIFFERENT.

[45:52] >> WHAT'S IN YOUR WALLET?

[45:53] >> Who's my liaison?

[45:55] >> Local hire. Sweetheart.

[45:57] >> Omar, what happens on a mission

[45:59] >> Mr. and Mrs. Gibson

[46:00] >> No, what

[46:02] >> Isn't supposed to come home.

[46:20] >> Welcome back.

[46:22] Welcome welcome back, MY NAUGHTY LITTLE

[46:24] CHICKENS.

[46:29] ROOSTERS, I MEAN.

[46:35] I CAN NEVER TELL THE DIFFERENCE. WHICH

[46:37] brings me to my next guest. Aha. Oh,

[46:40] crazy like a fox Ferguson. Thank you.

[46:45] My next guest is Canada's foremost

[46:48] expert on sex.

[46:52] She has a show Talk Sex with Sue

[46:54] Johanson. It's on Sundays on the Oxygen

[46:56] Network. Please welcome the lovely Sue

[46:58] Johanson, everybody.

[47:15] Welcome, Sue. How lovely to see you

[47:16] again.

[47:17] >> You give great hugs.

[47:19] >> Oh, thank you.

[47:21] >> You know, the total body hug.

[47:23] >> yeah.

[47:29] >> Is it working for you, honey?

[47:31] >> Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[47:34] We were going to show a clip from your

[47:36] show, but we couldn't get anyone past

[47:37] the censor.

[47:38] >> I know. Well, you know, we we do do do

[47:42] Yeah, we do do.

[47:43] >> Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[47:44] Yeah, but you do talk a lot of sexy talk

[47:47] on that show. I mean,

[47:49] how come you get away with it and I

[47:50] don't? I mean, is it because you're

[47:51] serious about it?

[47:52] >> No, it's because I'm older.

[47:54] >> Uh-huh.

[47:55] >> Um and because I have a very extensive

[47:58] vocabulary.

[47:59] >> Uh-huh.

[48:00] >> More than four-letter words.

[48:01] >> Well, I don't use four-letter words.

[48:04] >> Okay.

[48:07] And

[48:08] um, cuz I'm a grandma, and I'm a nurse,

[48:11] and I've been in the business for a long

[48:12] time. Is it I'm what you call long in

[48:14] the tooth?

[48:15] >> Uh-huh. And and what business you've

[48:17] been in the business of advising people

[48:19] about sex for a long time?

[48:20] >> Oh, I've been working in the sex area

[48:22] for a long time. I write

[48:22] >> Me too. Me too.

[48:25] I uh

[48:25] >> And you probably did better than I did,

[48:27] but you know, we won't go there.

[48:28] >> Well, sometimes in my own I was a bit

[48:30] frightened, but other than that it was

[48:31] all right.

[48:32] >> I DON'T KNOW.

[48:36] >> MADAM, I'M SCOTTISH.

[48:39] >> WHAT DO YOU MEAN TO SAY BECAUSE YOU'RE

[48:41] Scottish it's like this?

[48:42] >> All the time.

[48:43] >> Oh.

[48:45] >> RIGHT NOW?

[48:49] >> NOT.

[48:52] >> ALL RIGHT, LOOK. LET'S LET'S DO some

[48:54] Let's do some sexy What should What

[48:56] should men know about women that they

[48:58] don't know? And let's let's see. What

[48:59] What should men know about women that

[49:01] possibly they don't know?

[49:04] >> They probably

[49:05] should know

[49:07] that women don't have an orgasm every

[49:09] time they have sex.

[49:11] >> I knew that.

[49:12] >> You You knew that?

[49:15] That's what I

[49:17] So, you're not asking your You're not

[49:20] asking your partner, "Did you

[49:22] >> Uh

[49:25] No.

[49:26] >> Okay.

[49:27] >> No. In fact, I I have a hard time

[49:28] remembering to care. No, that's not

[49:30] true. That's not true.

[49:32] >> Oh, are we in trouble?

[49:34] >> No, I'm kidding. I'm kidding with you.

[49:36] So, that's what men should know that

[49:37] that women And what should women know

[49:38] about men that they don't know?

[49:40] >> Um, that that men don't know intuitively

[49:45] what works for women. What turns them

[49:48] on.

[49:48] >> Right.

[49:49] >> What works, because every female is

[49:50] different.

[49:51] >> Yes.

[49:52] >> And every female responds to different

[49:54] stimulation.

[49:55] >> Right.

[49:56] >> So, if women don't know

[49:57] >> No, you're telling me stuff that women

[49:59] should you know women should know about

[50:00] this, but men you know what

[50:02] >> But when if women don't know what works

[50:04] for us, then we can't tell you.

[50:06] >> should know what works for them.

[50:08] >> Absolutely.

[50:09] >> I see. Is there a general kind of like

[50:11] catch all thing that might work for

[50:12] everybody?

[50:14] There must be one thing.

[50:16] Like one thing you can either touch or

[50:18] pull or wiggle. Something you can just

[50:20] bang and then it's There must be a

[50:23] something.

[50:24] >> You don't know.

[50:27] Things that No wonder things are tough

[50:29] in your life.

[50:30] >> Yeah.

[50:31] >> No wonder we're working the late late

[50:32] late late show.

[50:37] >> I I don't understand.

[50:39] >> I can.

[50:39] >> What why? No, I I just think that men

[50:42] you know men are logical creatures and

[50:44] they would like to get some more

[50:45] information.

[50:46] >> Yeah, and we've got to be able to tell

[50:48] them. We've got to be able to take their

[50:50] hand and put it where we want it.

[50:52] >> Right.

[50:53] >> And we've got to be able to take their

[50:54] head and put it where WE WANT IT.

[51:00] >> I SEE.

[51:01] >> AHA.

[51:03] >> AH, THAT WON'T SAY.

[51:04] >> glad you invited me?

[51:05] >> Yes, I am. I am.

[51:07] I am.

[51:08] Um so um

[51:10] >> like this job?

[51:12] >> I do I do I do I DO YOU FIND that you

[51:15] get less active sexually as you get

[51:17] older or are you still just putting

[51:18] people's heads where you want them to

[51:20] be?

[51:21] Um

[51:23] >> Every chance I get.

[51:24] >> Yes, I am.

[51:26] >> UM

[51:30] YOU DO SLOW DOWN a little bit. It's

[51:32] called the urge to merge.

[51:34] >> Mhm.

[51:35] >> And that urge to merge does decrease as

[51:38] you get older.

[51:39] >> Oh, thank god.

[51:39] >> Yes. Yes, that's what I said.

[51:41] >> Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[51:42] >> But that need to hug and cuddle and

[51:44] snuggle and kiss and whisper sweet

[51:46] nothings and

[51:47] >> Yeah, that

[51:47] >> hasn't arrived for me yet.

[51:49] >> jeez.

[51:50] >> Well, you see, I'm a guy, you know, and

[51:52] what we do is we hug and snuggle and

[51:54] kiss cuz we have to.

[51:55] >> Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[51:56] Yeah, we've been doing it now for 10

[51:58] minutes, you know.

[51:59] >> Yeah.

[52:00] >> She should be ready by now. YOU READY

[52:01] YET?

[52:05] >> WELL, HOW DO HOW DO YOU HELP

[52:08] UH MEN and women communicate with each

[52:09] other? How do you personally do it? Do

[52:10] you sit down with both of them you say,

[52:11] "Okay, you take his hand and show him

[52:13] where he wants it to be uh you want it

[52:15] to be in?"

[52:16] >> Well, yeah, we Well, we've got to teach

[52:17] her first.

[52:18] >> Right.

[52:19] >> she's got to learn how to communicate

[52:20] with

[52:20] >> How do How does she find that out? Does

[52:22] she in some way Does she invite a

[52:24] European over? Or what?

[52:27] >> Brazilian.

[52:28] >> Brazilian.

[52:29] >> Yeah.

[52:29] >> Is it really the Brazilians? Are they

[52:31] the sexiest people in the world?

[52:34] >> Pretty good.

[52:34] >> Yeah?

[52:37] >> Yeah.

[52:37] >> Yeah.

[52:38] >> The ones I saw on the beach, yeah.

[52:40] >> Yeah, yeah.

[52:40] >> Yeah.

[52:40] >> Yeah, but just because you look sexy

[52:42] doesn't mean you are sexy, I hope.

[52:46] >> Uh that explains more, yes.

[52:48] >> yeah.

[52:49] >> Two out of three ain't bad.

[52:51] >> Yeah, yeah. Well, I don't know. I mean,

[52:53] these These then the the sexiest people

[52:55] in the world do you think then the

[52:55] Brazilians? I just I I I need this for

[52:57] my own research.

[52:58] >> Oh, yeah.

[52:59] So, you're going down to Rio.

[53:01] >> I I might if you tell me they're the

[53:03] sexiest people in the world, yeah.

[53:04] >> They're very good. They're very good.

[53:06] >> yeah.

[53:07] Uh any anywhere else closer?

[53:11] >> Well, I I've seen some

[53:13] uh on on the beach here in

[53:16] >> Is that Is that the See, I never Don't

[53:17] you think that clothing on people is a

[53:20] little more sexy than clothing off

[53:21] people?

[53:22] >> Oh, absolutely. The stretch marks and

[53:25] and the adipose tissue and and the the

[53:27] bruises and the hickeys and and all the

[53:30] rest.

[53:32] >> You have been to Scotland, HAVEN'T YOU?

[53:36] >> ACTUALLY, I HAVE.

[53:37] >> YEAH, I KNOW.

[53:38] YOU PAINTED THE PICTURE so well.

[53:42] And Canada, of course. Are Can Are

[53:43] Canadian You're Canadian Are Canadian

[53:45] sexy? Are they sexy people the

[53:46] Canadians?

[53:47] >> When we thaw out.

[53:48] >> Yeah.

[53:49] >> Yeah.

[53:50] We have you know

[53:51] >> So they're sexy for a couple of months

[53:52] of the year.

[53:53] >> It's it's damn poor skiing two months of

[53:55] you know for two months of the year and

[53:57] the rest of the time

[53:58] we

[54:00] it's cool.

[54:00] >> You can

[54:02] What What do you use when you're talking

[54:03] about sex? You just say sex then or you

[54:05] don't have any like made up words?

[54:08] Do you have to use the proper word all

[54:09] the time?

[54:10] >> Oh no no no I use what I call slanguage.

[54:12] >> Oh yeah.

[54:13] >> Which is a combination of medical

[54:15] terminology and street language.

[54:18] >> Yes please illustrate this for me.

[54:22] >> And then of course we have the the sex

[54:24] toys on the show every week. A different

[54:27] sex toy every week.

[54:29] >> Do you Yeah I know I know Do you have a

[54:31] different sex toy every week?

[54:33] >> Yes of course.

[54:33] >> Well well I thought it was like one and

[54:35] that was it.

[54:35] >> Oh no no no.

[54:38] No no.

[54:39] We have a different one every

[54:41] every single week.

[54:42] >> Yeah right and how how do they Where do

[54:45] you get them?

[54:45] >> The company

[54:48] The company that produces them will send

[54:50] send them to us and we test them.

[54:53] >> How do you test them? Do you test them?

[54:56] >> You want to test them do you?

[54:58] >> Sue you're endlessly fascinating and you

[55:00] keep screaming at me that the show's

[55:02] over but I've so much to ask you. Will

[55:03] you come back again?

[55:04] >> Absolutely.

[55:05] >> Ah god damn it. Sue you're awesome

[55:07] everybody. We'll be right back.

[55:21] >> I'm playing.

[55:22] >> I'm playing.

[55:24] >> You know I'm playing.

[55:25] >> I'm playing.

[55:26] >> Believe it. I'm playing.

[55:28] >> Yeah I'm playing.

[55:29] >> This Thanksgiving

[55:31] there's a new tradition.

[55:33] Three NFL games.

[55:36] >> Did you see that?

[55:45] >> On your wedding day, it's all about the

[55:48] bride.

[55:50] Her dress,

[55:52] her flowers,

[55:54] her hair.

[55:56] But when everyone is looking at her,

[55:59] she'll be looking at you.

[56:01] So, rent your tuxedo at Men's Wearhouse

[56:03] and you'll look almost as good as she

[56:05] does. You're going to like the way you

[56:07] look.

[56:08] I guarantee it.

[56:16] >> Chevy, nine out of 10 cars we sell get

[56:18] an estimated 30 miles per gallon highway

[56:21] or better.

[56:26] Learn more. Go to Yahoo and click autos.

[56:29] >> Qualified lessees can get a low mileage

[56:30] lease on this '07 Cobalt Coupe LS for

[56:32] around 199 a month. Residency

[56:34] restrictions apply.

[56:35] >> Call for details. See your participating

[56:37] Northwest Chevy dealer or visit us

[56:38] online at shopforchevy.com.

[56:41] >> Ah, clear the mind. Mind clear.

[56:47] I still can't figure out how I got

[56:48] charged twice for that pair of socks.

[56:51] That doesn't make sense.

[56:52] Unless they charged me per sock. Those

[56:55] would have to be some pretty good socks

[56:56] if they were individually priced.

[56:59] Although they were argyle.

[57:01] >> Shop happy with buyer protection

[57:03] services and simple dispute resolution.

[57:06] It's more than just a card. It's the

[57:08] service of American Express.

[57:11] >> Every year tar and creosote build-up

[57:13] causes thousands of chimney fires. Help

[57:16] protect your home with CSL creosote

[57:18] sweeping log. Now accepted by the

[57:20] Chimney Safety Institute of America.

[57:22] Each time you use your fireplace,

[57:23] flammable tar and creosote builds up and

[57:26] can catch fire. Simply burn CSL like a

[57:28] regular log. Its active minerals will

[57:30] dry out and reduce dangerous tar and

[57:32] creosote deposits, making your home

[57:34] safer. Get CSL creosote sweeping log.

[57:37] >> CSL creosote sweeping log is available

[57:40] at The Home Depot.

[57:45] >> ALL RIGHT, EVERYBODY.

[57:48] WELL,

[57:50] THAT'S ABOUT ALL WE'VE GOT TIME FOR

[57:52] TONIGHT.

[57:55] I want to thank my guests, Christian

[57:57] Slater, Sue Johanson,

[58:02] and James D'Arcy. Join me tomorrow night

[58:05] with Emilio Estevez and some other

[58:07] people. Goodnight, everybody. Goodnight.

[58:59] >> KGW 6, good morning, Northwest.

[59:01] Portland's fastest growing morning news.

[59:04] See why tomorrow at 5:00 and 6:00 a.m.

[59:09] >> Home is a feast. It's where you bring

[59:11] people together. Home is